Many years ago I sat in a circle of elder Black women who had just returned from a life-changing trip to West Africa. They all radiated an electric energy that charged the air in my lungs. One had asked me to recount my recent experience as the only White participant in conference workshop for women of African descent. The experience had been intensely humbling and had left me painfully aware of my unconscious sense of superiority. I was shaky and unnerved by the time I finished telling my story, unsure how it would be received and what I should do next. One of the women, Julie Doris, got up and walked behind me, put her hands on my shoulders, and said very loudly, "You've been called!" I didn't know exactly what this meant, but the electricity flowing from her hands into my body changed me at a cellular level. That day I started writing, and I haven't stopped since. Julie is now an ancestor in the Spirit World, and I call on her for guidance when I'm unsure of my next steps.
It sounds like you had a similar experience Kern. May the ancestors who watch over you send you clarity and courage as you go forward, using your words to express the contribution you've been called to make.
Whatever our state of privilege, we know there are those who cannot speak, write or even read freely. Compared to so many countries around the world, we are freer to express ourselves relatively fearlessly.
Yet, all around us, more authoritarian leaders are rising up. We can look to the past, and to the present in some spots on the globe, where brave speech and honest communication are being muted.
What are we to do? Share as you did. Open doors for others. Listen to others.
If you have read my last few Substack newsletters (Somewhen by Karen Altergott Roberts), you know my ancestors had at least 135 years of being silenced…). But silencing is happening today too, in so many places.
Thank you for sharing some important voices. I’d like to hear more.
Thanks so much for bringing this up, Karen. In our "free" countries, freedom is being threatened far more greatly than most people recognize. I've seen the other side of that now; It's not a place we want to be. So you're right, we need to keep going, keep writing, keep sharing. We don't want to get there.
Dear Kern, I very much connect to your words (again). It sounds like you might be challenging some of the ideas you have about writing, life and the writing life. I think it is a sign that you are evolving. While it often feels uncomfortable, I think it is a sign of growth, so embrace it.
As for your question, I have been grappling with a similar thought especially since October 7. What is the point of my writing/ anything when the world feels so cruel, so full of horror? I resisted as hard as I could writing about the conflict knowing how divisive it is. But I didn’t last long, because my conscious wouldn’t allow me to stay silent. « How can you claim to be about encouraging respectful conversations and bringing people together when you don’t speak about something so close to your heart? « my conscious asked. So I did, speak up. And I took the riskier, least popular position- that of our shared humanity and peace. And I have turned my family against me. But - something of a little miracle happened… yesterday after posting a particularly vulnerable post about « searching for still water (peace and calm », a post that took me 2 straight days to write while sobbing, I’ve received the following message (in French): this is one of the most beautiful texts I have read in a long time. Today, thanks to you, you have opened my heart to the other side, and I have found a little my humanity. Thank you and peace for all. » This message has made all the difference! My writing has managed to open the heart of one person! For me that means my job is done. After that, I was prepared to put up with my family’s angry messages. I no longer cared. And in fact, the heartfelt, loving messages kept coming - from both my Jewish and Muslim friends. They felt the pain in my words, the tears with which I wrote the piece and the risk I took.
Sorry, this was my long way of telling you that writing, and stories matter. Yes, they don’t change much in the grand scheme of things (unfortunately). Greedy politicians still run the show. But - if they can open the heart of one person and make the world just a little more accepting and less hateful, isn’t it worth it?
So keep on writing and keep on asking yourself tough questions. 🤗
I can't tell you how much I needed to hear that story. Thank you for your courage in listening to your conscience. You've proven the power of words to make change.
So happy to hear Kern. That is precisely why I shared this story with you. Besides the fact that my daughters think I’m bad-ass number one and are incredibly proud of me and my writing :)
I think it’s a rarer thing to realize priviledge when you’re a person of colour, but this sounds like one of those circumstances. Of course it will come with a flurry of emotions. What I take from you sharing this is a fire to share my stories and continue my journey of writing because I have been awarded the privilege to do so without fear. I write using different pronouns and share all different types of families and it never occurred to me that if I was living somewhere else I wouldn’t be able to do this. That I would be punished for doing this. So I will write. I will share. I will represent, for those who cannot.
Many years ago I sat in a circle of elder Black women who had just returned from a life-changing trip to West Africa. They all radiated an electric energy that charged the air in my lungs. One had asked me to recount my recent experience as the only White participant in conference workshop for women of African descent. The experience had been intensely humbling and had left me painfully aware of my unconscious sense of superiority. I was shaky and unnerved by the time I finished telling my story, unsure how it would be received and what I should do next. One of the women, Julie Doris, got up and walked behind me, put her hands on my shoulders, and said very loudly, "You've been called!" I didn't know exactly what this meant, but the electricity flowing from her hands into my body changed me at a cellular level. That day I started writing, and I haven't stopped since. Julie is now an ancestor in the Spirit World, and I call on her for guidance when I'm unsure of my next steps.
It sounds like you had a similar experience Kern. May the ancestors who watch over you send you clarity and courage as you go forward, using your words to express the contribution you've been called to make.
Wow, Phyllis. Thank you so much for this. First for sharing your story and second for sharing your wisdom. So much love.
This is beautiful!
This is so vulnerable and powerful — a both/and. Thanks for sharing from your heart, Kern.
Thanks Nancy! I feel like I couldn't even do the experience justice with my words, but so glad you connected with this piece.
I understand you.
Whatever our state of privilege, we know there are those who cannot speak, write or even read freely. Compared to so many countries around the world, we are freer to express ourselves relatively fearlessly.
Yet, all around us, more authoritarian leaders are rising up. We can look to the past, and to the present in some spots on the globe, where brave speech and honest communication are being muted.
What are we to do? Share as you did. Open doors for others. Listen to others.
If you have read my last few Substack newsletters (Somewhen by Karen Altergott Roberts), you know my ancestors had at least 135 years of being silenced…). But silencing is happening today too, in so many places.
Thank you for sharing some important voices. I’d like to hear more.
Thanks so much for bringing this up, Karen. In our "free" countries, freedom is being threatened far more greatly than most people recognize. I've seen the other side of that now; It's not a place we want to be. So you're right, we need to keep going, keep writing, keep sharing. We don't want to get there.
Dear Kern, I very much connect to your words (again). It sounds like you might be challenging some of the ideas you have about writing, life and the writing life. I think it is a sign that you are evolving. While it often feels uncomfortable, I think it is a sign of growth, so embrace it.
As for your question, I have been grappling with a similar thought especially since October 7. What is the point of my writing/ anything when the world feels so cruel, so full of horror? I resisted as hard as I could writing about the conflict knowing how divisive it is. But I didn’t last long, because my conscious wouldn’t allow me to stay silent. « How can you claim to be about encouraging respectful conversations and bringing people together when you don’t speak about something so close to your heart? « my conscious asked. So I did, speak up. And I took the riskier, least popular position- that of our shared humanity and peace. And I have turned my family against me. But - something of a little miracle happened… yesterday after posting a particularly vulnerable post about « searching for still water (peace and calm », a post that took me 2 straight days to write while sobbing, I’ve received the following message (in French): this is one of the most beautiful texts I have read in a long time. Today, thanks to you, you have opened my heart to the other side, and I have found a little my humanity. Thank you and peace for all. » This message has made all the difference! My writing has managed to open the heart of one person! For me that means my job is done. After that, I was prepared to put up with my family’s angry messages. I no longer cared. And in fact, the heartfelt, loving messages kept coming - from both my Jewish and Muslim friends. They felt the pain in my words, the tears with which I wrote the piece and the risk I took.
Sorry, this was my long way of telling you that writing, and stories matter. Yes, they don’t change much in the grand scheme of things (unfortunately). Greedy politicians still run the show. But - if they can open the heart of one person and make the world just a little more accepting and less hateful, isn’t it worth it?
So keep on writing and keep on asking yourself tough questions. 🤗
I can't tell you how much I needed to hear that story. Thank you for your courage in listening to your conscience. You've proven the power of words to make change.
So happy to hear Kern. That is precisely why I shared this story with you. Besides the fact that my daughters think I’m bad-ass number one and are incredibly proud of me and my writing :)
Ahhh love that! I'll take any opportunity to impress my daughter lol
Haha. I had a feeling!! :))
I think it’s a rarer thing to realize priviledge when you’re a person of colour, but this sounds like one of those circumstances. Of course it will come with a flurry of emotions. What I take from you sharing this is a fire to share my stories and continue my journey of writing because I have been awarded the privilege to do so without fear. I write using different pronouns and share all different types of families and it never occurred to me that if I was living somewhere else I wouldn’t be able to do this. That I would be punished for doing this. So I will write. I will share. I will represent, for those who cannot.
Yes, yes, yes!!!! We will write!