28 Comments

Thanks for sharing all this, it's incredibly insightful for those of us on the outside (for now), looking in. Don't beat yourself up for "cheating." You're supporting your daughter's uni attendance, which one could argue is a "cheat" on the other side of the balance sheet.

One question: how do you fit in writing when your schedule heats up as you describe? (Festival travel, etc.)

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I'm an early riser, Michael. I do all of my creative writing from 6:00-9:00 a.m. It's the only time of the day I can write undisturbed and I need to be undisturbed to do my best writing.

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On the same schedule! :)

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Thank you for your honesty Kern. I don't think you need to feel bad for "breaking your promise" by accepting a copy writing gig. We could do worse, for our children. Once you become a parent - especially a single parent - your priorities really shift, and your survival is not a joke. For years, I took on painting gigs, translation jobs, and even cleaned houses (with then five languages under my belt) to keep my daughters and myself afloat. I have zero regrets, and zero shame about that. This is why when I finally received (two!) writing grants to write my book, my daughter cried. She was so proud of me because she knew the hard work it took to make it happen. Becoming a full-time writer is not a small achievement et je suis fière de toi! :)

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Thank you Imola. I can literally feel your encouragement and your spirit leaping of the page. And yes, I am proud of me too 🙃

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Brilliant! Thanks for sharing all of this Kern.

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You're very welcome, Gloria. It's good to give insight into these things from time to time.

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As someone who makes less than $30,000 a year, it appears to me you're rolling in the dough!

Good for you. Just know you're doing fine . . . at least from my vantage point.

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Thank you for sharing so much and so opening. I don't think you failed at all. Cheating when you have to pay the bills is just information about how the project is going. I'm still really inspired that you got as far as you did. Well done!

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Love this honesty, thanks for sharing!

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Of course! Any insight to help other authors :)

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I value your honesty so much! I think I comment that basically every other post, but your Substack is so essential and beautiful for its frankness. Thank you for sharing :).

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Awww thanks so much, Nikita! Love that you feel that way.

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Cheers Kern, really appreciated this. Of course you didn’t fail! The reason this post helped so much is that as I continue to try and write my first book and pursue a career in writing there is no blueprint out there like if someone wants to become a doctor or lawyer. It’s so helpful and generous for you to shed light on the hustle and let us really see what are the kinds of things you do to make a living and decisions you make along the way. So much respect. Thank you!

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Glad to help provide some perspective, Charles. Good luck to you on your own writing journey.

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I think you did great Kern.

There is no shame Kern, you have adapted to an ever changing environment - expect more global changes after the US elections ( it seems most people have winced at the results ), many expect there will be Trade Wars etc, that will influence all Governments budgets/revenues and taxes - expect more inflation, adding more to the cost for living - everywhere.

So what does a creative do ? Adapt and be flexible; you know dreams are not set in concrete, so re-invent yourself; some dreams can no longer serve you and you need to bust that myth about the idealized author's life in nirvana.

It is writing after all, a skill you honed and developed over the years. So who cares if you take on a variety of freelance nonfiction works. It pays; it is revenue, do not feel disgusted. But that is the first piece of the puzzle.

Talking to creatives they will tell you it is all about revenue and costs.

They have a simple model to make their work worth while: increase sales to make a decent profit or if that is not possible cut costs. Some creatives have chosen countries to work remotely because of cheaper living environment and they are having a ball while they are at it. Portugal has some very good enticements for digital nomads; creatives and authors for up to 5 years. I know many that live there now.

But you have left this out.Start planning very early on for your retirement - you will not be young forever. So let compounding work you - earn while you sleep and write. It is all about boosting your financial literacy in this day and age for an independent multi-disciplined creative.

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All true words Nicholas. Being financially sophisticated is a must!

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Thank you for your transparency and for sharing all of this, Kern. Our son is a sophomore in college, so I understand how expensive that is, too. I believe that in this day and age, having diverse income streams is often needed to sustain a creative life. I think you should be proud of yourself! It sounds like your income came entirely from writing, which to me, is awesome.

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Thanks, Steph. And it does feel good that all my income comes from writing. That in itself feels like an accomplishment. I would be lying, though, if I didn't say that I want all of it, or most of it, to come from being an author. The source of me wanting that is something I psychoanalyze a lot, but it's there.

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Then I will be rooting for you to achieve that goal! I think your commitment and determination (along with your excellent writing) will take you a long way. Wishing you the best!

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Many thanks 🙏🏾

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Thanks for your transparency, Kern. We really need to be talking about this more. Finances is a huge part of why we keep writing or not. It also means that some are starting on different playing fields than others. It is helpful to know this too because sometimes we are hard on ourselves. Thanks again.

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We're always so hard on ourselves. I know for sure I will get to where I want to be. But the journey is part of the achievement, though, so finding a way to accept it all is the challenge. And agreed, we need way more conversations like this.

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This was lovely--thanks for sharing. Terrible conundrum at the end. For what it's worth, I think you probably made the right call. Goals are important, but we shouldn't kick ourselves too hard for falling short. Next year is another year, and to ask our art to pay entirely for our lives is perhaps too much to ask of our art--it can be terrible to strain it with that kind of pressure. Thanks for the read, and best of luck with your upcoming year and writing!

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Appreciate that, Peter. A terrible conundrum indeed, but one I'm sure so many artists face every day.

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Thanks for sharing all of this! It makes me think of that part in Big Magic where Elizabeth Gilbert talks about supporting our creativity rather than asking it to support us. Your whole year was an experiment in finding that balance, because it looks different for everyone. It's tough out there, but grateful to learn from your experience!

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Thanks Sarah. I thought a lot about that Elizabeth Gilbert messagee. There is so much to process about that mindset because in some ways it conflicts with my ultimate goal. Where does one line end and another begin, know what I mean?

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Exactly. It's so individual. And honestly there's not a super great way to define that line for oneself without actually going through it. I know I learned a lot about what my creativity can handle and what it can't when I went full time myself for a year.

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